Mark: God

God: what?

M: You’re God?

G: Do I look like God to you?

“God is in a form of a man wearing a white hoodie over a violet t-shirt with light grey jeans and bare feet. His finely detailed wrinkly face speaks of a forty year old healthy man. His lit up white hair is pulled back in a pony-tail with a void black hair band. His eyes are ocean blue with different hints of greyish green fading into their glow”

After spacing out into God’s eyes, Mark Snaps back

M: well, does this mean I am dead?

G: Dead? How can you talk to me if you are?

Mark rubs his eyes, looks around only to realize that he and the old man are sitting right in the middle of the big apple, New York City.

M: We’re in New York!?

G: The Big Apple, Newwww Yoooork (Sings)… Are you lost?

M: Lost… I don’t know, last thing I remember I was in a car crash.. in LA

G: Car Crash? What happened man? Don’t you remember?

M: Remember what?

G: You just hit some good DMT, 20 minutes ago.. and you just came back.

M: What?.. I don’t remember that.. DMT? Isn’t that the stuff that makes you hallucinate?

G: Yes & No…

M: Does that mean I was hallucinating? How? I cant remember even being here… but this place it’s familiar..

G: Well.. You should listen carefully.. You didn’t hallucinate. DMT doesn’t show something that’s not there, it shows you that which you cannot see. But just because you can’t see it doesn’t mean it’s not there. What happened was you went somewhere else, to another life, another reality, you lived it, but you were here all this time. All that just happened was as real as this is, where we are now.

M: Does this mean, that LA and the accident, So I did die..

G: You’re here now, and where’s there? Your body never left here. You’ve been here all along. You were just out, on a trip, somewhere with your mind.

M: Like being on a train ride?

G: Sure you can perceive it as such. But the craziest thing is that you never were on the train, your body has been here all through what you saw there. You never really left, or went.

M: Are you saying I was dreaming?

G: You’re smart, but what makes you think you were dreaming, what makes you think you’re not dreaming right now?

M: So the car crash, my life in LA, my death, it was all just a dream…. Wait… so where am I? I don’t remember being here.. Who are you? Why are you messing with my head?

G: Calm down, mark, breathe.. steady now

M: No, No, NOOO this can’t be real (Gets up, panicked rushing away from God) No Way Man! This is not real (Takes a step backwards)…

G: Watch out!

Mark Gets run over by a bus – fade out.

God and Mark are sitting on a cloud somewhere in the heavens….

M: Am I dead now? Is this heaven?

G: No, You didn’t die, can’t you see, there’s no death. You’ve been here all along too, you’ve been everywhere, Mark.

M: (Stares blankly at the old man)

G: Mark, are you here?

M: This doesn’t make any sense, they told me, I’d die, how can there be no death, I can’t believe any of this.. why would they lie to me.. NO! This is NOT real.. NO! This can not be real. I didn’t sign up for this.. No NO… Don’t Lie to me. Stop.. NOOO!

Mark gets up afraid, panicked, and antsy. He starts walking away, trembling, he starts running, trips over his own feet and falls out of heaven.

—-The End

An understanding must be first brought into consideration; the understanding that everything is one, that there is no me or you, there just is, this one thought, manifesting itself in an illusion of separation; this illusion of separation resulted as an experimental desire or longing from the one through; experiencing something dissimilar, creating polarized alternatives, being something unlike, scorching away and radiating outwards.

The radiating outwards could perhaps explain the big bang, if there is such a thing. However the big bang states a beginning to time, or implies a start point. While in the experience of one, time is but a practice in the illusion, thus the idea of time in its current format is ultimately obsolete. Future, present and past are the main construct of the illusion. To open your eyes within the illusion is an alternative lie; for you can never open your eyes as a “you”, you can only awaken as a “not you”. That is the part of “enlightenment” that everyone or no-one has been trying to explain, since forever, yet due to the limitations of words and individual perspectives, each seemingly separate one, appearing as an “I” is only seeing from its own two eyes. Alas, any explanation or decoding of the journey would just be like watching another movie and trying to make sense of it. Though, perhaps, it can be helpful, you have to beware prior to embarking on this journey however, that you are the only one that can open your own eyes and wake yourself up. No one can do it for you, no one can tell you how; they can maybe only show you how they did it and from there you might pick up on some information yourself but inevitably it is you that has to start your “awakening journey”.

Are you ready to erase your memory of you?

Everything is telling their stories…. Truth is, there is no story, except, the one story and that one story is perplexed in a vortex of infinite possibilities, infinite what if’s and infinite what if not’s; progressive manifestation. Yet within all the complexities of infinity, they’re all just stories, just other tales told, another legend glorified, and another blockbuster produced, with “I” as the star of the show. The story is, that there is nothing but the story, and that story is just a fleeting thought.

What are we if our lives are just a thought? Then are we thoughts thinking ourselves alive? Are we thinking our lives and living them? What if I am living a fucked up life, a life of pain and despair? How can I be the one thinking myself into that?

“Expectations form virtual realities in the mind; Manifestations transmute them to their physical equivalent within the dream-state. The former is a projection of a non-existent ego, and the later is a fabric of collective “ego-realities”. What we call reality, is not.” – B. Skywalker

Thought; the power you have is the power I give you.

I dig you a hole and sit in it, or I build you a ladder and climb it.

If I surround myself with you, I drown through you; subconsciously.

My mind is very tricky in formulating and thinking my life as I go through its experience. It picks up from my past memories of me, transmits that information and experiences into the matrix of collective thought. Then it synchronizes with all other information and experiences in that web, perhaps recording this planetary cycle’s progression. The matrix then starts molding a manifest for the illusion of future through a digest of possibilities collected from directly experiencing these past memories simultaneously. And, thus the illusion of a future is created. The past however plays an equally important role in creating the conditions for my mind’s function. The illusion of past experiences and their correlated traumas or joy-ness are part of my separation experience experiment. Which resulted in the duality of my emotions, and  myself. The duality of my life is as obvious as a clear sky, I was born to look through two eyes, I have two ears, two hands, two legs, two balls, two nostrils, two ass cheeks, two lungs. The function of my organs is to metaphorically point out my own duality, I think I am two. Though, the deeper I look at my body, I find one heart pumping, one brain divided into two sides and a one non-me looking through the two eyes of a separate – I – ndividual. In the female species there is one womb. This metaphorically points to the womb I am in, this universe. I am the creation of the one that came about from a thought and I’m inside this womb awaiting my exit, from my entrance.

Death is my road to awe. With death I exit this 3D realm to return to… This statement is within itself true, for our bodies will decay, return to the earth and come out as trees or whatever. However, I, the character built within the illusion is what is going to vanish, the individuality of me in this experience. I cannot explain to you what will happen to me after I die, or tell you that there’s heaven or hell. Yet the only thing I can say is that when death happens, I won’t need to worry about what comes next, because I would have entered, and whether I enter as me or a not me, there’s no escaping that exit.

The easiest way of looking at it, is that the way out is the way in, and the way in is the way out. You need to go inside the room to go out, and you need to go out of the room, to maybe come back in again. That’s how it always works. Just keep reminding yourself though, that the you, you think of, as you, is not you. The name, the character and the traits you gave yourself, are not you. They are just an imagination or a thought that you created to watch life through. You’re the observer, life itself functioning as a living thing.

Within these statements there is a limitation brought upon my words, by your perception of words. The idea is that the thing that’s functioning can’t be spoken of, it’s beyond words, it just functions, it is only present, Omni-present, and it is, in its own presence unknown, to itself, but it is not other than you being aware of writing this, through me.

Confused arrays

Ashes white, black and grey bundled

With deflowered buds

In blindly painted ashtrays

A flock of un-tamed animals

Ingesting fumes of acidic fuels

Sitting on the high broken stools of a

Mildly brewed pitcher perfect pub

“Where is my Jagger?”

Demented with un-intended desires

A haven of un-realized, burning fire

a Soulless city revisited by the ghosts

of its corporate past.

Come back, for the freshly drunk blood

They have returned to nest and bleed.

Confused arrays and dead bodies in ashtrays

The flock construct a tomb

A grave for those who misbehave

The junkyard of the free

A pub with a bar,

“Drink from the lethe!”

Oblivion was just a sip a way

A beaker held high by its forgetful eyes

Holding water from the Greek underworld river

“Lethe”

beneath it, Engraved in stone

“Your worldly suffering will be washed away

A sip from me will show you the way

Hidden beneath the skin of the un-dead

Lies the secret passage to Covets Creek!”

We are not dead or alive; we create an imagination of ourselves and dream it is our own to live.

When someone asks you something and you say you know, that’s a lie. You don’t know anything for anyone, yet you know everything for no-one. The No-one, which is you. But do you know what’s worse? What’s worse is that you keep trying to look somewhere else for answers, and you can’t seem to stop and face the emptiness of yourself; the fear in your own shadow. You walk, day after day casting a shadow under you. You hid your fears well, in broad day light, right beneath your feet. No one suspected it. No one suspected that you hid your fears in your own shadow. And ironically that no-one, is you. That emptiness is your own non-self. The formless void that you cast the day you were born.

What are you running away from? What are you so busy reading about in books that you can’t take a moment and look inside yourself to find? What is it that you think you’ll find by reading this? Some sort of revelation? Some sort of reminder? Are you so weak that you can’t just remind yourself? Where’s your warrior spirit? What happened to your strength?

You lie to yourself, you say you are weak. You judge yourself in a corner and you don’t want to move. You like it. You like lying to yourself about it.

You say you’re distracted. That’s another lie. You intentionally throw yourself all over the place with your thoughts. No one else is there. Only you and your thoughts, your distraction is that you don’t want to face it. You don’t want to face what is right in front of you. You don’t want to face what is deep within you when you close your eyes. You don’t want to stream into your own darkness.

You just don’t want to face yourself, admit it. You’re too afraid of yourself. You’re too afraid of you. And when you got to see yourself you felt comfort and discomfort, then the little sound in you said.“No, don’t” that little sound that keeps you stuck in your fear, that little sound that makes you mad, insane. That little sound that pushes you away from the one thing you can’t run away from, like a snake eating its tail. Your own emptiness is yours to be with. No one will do it for you. Use the irony, you are no-one. Turn the table around. Enter yourself. Enter your emptiness.

What are you holding on to?

What are you stuck on?

Who remembers?

How long are you going to stay in non-remembrance?

What will it take to ignite your being again?

What will it take for your butterfly to fly?

What will it take for your heart to flow again?

What will it take for you, to stand covered up in your fear, drenching in its filth then burn it off with the strength of your love?

The star you were; What will it take to make it shine?

Can’t you see it?

Can’t you see yourself?

Look at you!

Look in you!

Undrain!

Un-know!

Find what fills you and suck it dry

Drink every last bit of what quenches your thirst

Be the maniac, that doesn’t stop until they get what they…..

And don’t stop there. Further is the word. Don’t stop at anything! Never stop for anyone! Don’t let anything bring you back or pull you down!

Devour everything in your way.

WAKE UP! NOW!

And through it all, I will be the wall that holds your back straight! Feed on me, if need be. Drain me, if you can.

But you won’t know how to, for I overflow.

I am the inexhaustible source. I am the everlasting you. I am your whole emptiness. I am your loved fears, your strong weaknesses.

I am what fuels you to live and what is going to kill you when you least expect it. I am your creator and destroyer and from once you left me you shall return to me. For in me there is the vast emptiness that is full, with all of you.

And when your dream is over, you’ll wake up and realize it was only I in here. There never came a you, it was but a dream and like all,

All dreams end.

Awakening always is. Truth never left. It was all but a dream.

 

 

Row Row Row your boat

Gently down the stream

Merrily Merrily Merrily

Life is but a Dream